Maybe I’m wholly alone in what I am about to write here. Maybe I quit playing baseball too early and coached only those who are too young.

In a “meaningless” spring training game on Thursday, San Francisco Giants pitcher Barry Zito, normally a deeply philosophical former Cy Young Award winner, drilled Milwaukee Brewers first baseman Prince Fielder in the back. It was not an accident.

You see, it comes to this. Last September, when the games did count and the Brewers and Giants were involved in a wild card chase, Fielder hit a walk-off home run against the Giants. Only Fielder’s teammates didn’t walk off. They fell down.

In a preconceived celebration, Fielder rounded the bases and jumped with his 270-pound frame on home plate. At that moment, his waiting teammates all fell over backward, like bowling pins struck down at the hand of Tom Smallwood (now there’s a guy with a narrative!).