1. Observe how your child expresses love to you. If your daughter is always looking for a hug, this may be an indication that her primary love language is physical touch. If your son is always giving praise or thanks-"Mommy, this is a good meal"-his love language may be words ofaffirmation.

2. Listen to your child's requests. What the child requests most often is a clue to his/her primary love language. "Daddy, can we go to the park?" "Mommy, can you read me a story?" These children are asking for quality time, and it is probably their primary love language.

3. Listen to the complaints. "Why didn't you bring me a present?" may be your son's way of telling you that his love language is gifts. "We don't ever go to the beach anymore?" may be an indication that the child's primary love language is quality time.