With A Heavy Heart [Part II]

Renee Johnson — Mon, 21 Jun 2010 23:16:42 -0700

"A righteous man is cautious in friendship, but the way of the wicked leads them astray" (Proverbs 12:26).

Apparently, I didn't get that memo. Choose my friends s-l-o-w-l-y? No way! My heart is five-times the normal size. I've experienced just as much brokenness as I have Jesus' glory and healing power. Plus, I have too much to give!!!

Here I am in the midst of writing my second book on brokenness and it's lonely. All those thoughts of hurt floating around in my head. As I write it out it hurts less and less, but when I try and share those experiences with friends I keep getting hurt. Why do I stink at choosing my friends? I have many friends, and yet when I look around...

Honestly? The selfish part in me just wanted to write a three sentence blog with the verse from Luke 5:16 that says, "But Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed." Then I'd follow it up with I'm lonely. I'm in a desert place? Who else has been there? The end.

That's me. Right now. I'm lonely. In the past six months I have been called a spiritual failure, not a Christian, and yada yada yada -- all from people I thought were my best friends. We even said I love you.

Hypocrisy happens when I care more about what people think of me than what God thinks of me.

I really just want to hurt them back. But I can't. Trust me I've tried, but God gives me a swift kick in the butt. Like tonight, I was recounting one of the experiences I mentioned above with an old friend and I felt convicted. Like, "why did I have to go there again?" kind of a thing. Really Renee? Really? It's over; let it go.

One of my values to live by this year is Trust. Each year I pick a few values to live by, ones I feel God is calling me to grow and learn, and it's interesting how it's evolved into obedience. Trust = Obedience.

Suddenly I, the Debbie Downer, just became the unwilling (and hurt) servant who is having a difficulty following in His master's shoes. No matter HOW lonely, and HOW many people desert and/or disown me will I be found obedient?

Jesus said in John 17:9-13:

"I pray for them. I am not praying for the world, but for those you have given me, for they are yours...Holy Father, protect them by the power of your name...While I was with them, I protected them and kept them safe by that name you gave me. None has been lost except the one doomed to destruction so that Scripture would be fulfilled (Judas). I am coming to you now, but I say these things while I am still in the world, so that they may have the full measure of my joy within them..."

Oh, give me back my joy again; you have broken me—now let me rejoice" (Psalm 51:8 NLT).

Loving the Enemy

Carrie Nye — Thu, 02 Jul 2009 21:24:53 -0700

I sat down with my friend Seeran recently to talk a bit about a trip she took to Turkey. Thoughts of reconciliation came to mind for me as we spoke. Specifically these verses from Corinthians,

All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation: that God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, not counting men's sins against them. And he has committed to us the message of reconciliation.

It can be very difficult to love those we are taught to think of as our enemies. Have you experienced this before? How have you seen reconciliation take place? Where do you think we need reconciliation today?

enemy

With A Heavy Heart [Part II]

Loving the Enemy