My friend Addie is four and lives in her own little world.  In Addie’s world there is no hurry.  In her world you can wear your clothes backwards and change them every hour.  In Addie’s world there is lots of singing.  There is much dancing.  There is no need to brush your hair.  Addie’s world is a collage of projects and music and make-believe games.  She occasionally emerges from her world and greets my world with a word of affection or a hug or a randomly placed, “buenos dias”.  She may remind you she is four and then revert back to her world of daydreams and songs.

I find myself being jealous of Addie and her sweet oblivion.  Even when her mom gets frustrated with her, it doesn’t seem to shake her out of her own rhythm.  This is something I pray she holds onto.  It seems other people can constantly shake me out of my rhythm; a misinterpreted comment here, a judgmental response there, my own off perceptions of what others think, all cause me to fall in line with the expectations of others instead of living merrily in the space God intended for me.  Right when I think I’ve given up any concern for what others think, it comes back, sneaking into my thoughts and perceptions.

She is perfectly content to lolly gag and dance in her backwards clothes.  When I watch her play and wander I pray desperately that any jolt to reality will be gentle on her, that she will influence others with her creativity and carefree spirit more than they will squelch her.  And as I pray for her, I suppose I am praying the same for myself.  I pray that I would have the courage to live in Addie’s world in the midst of a world that really doesn’t offer either of us all that much. 

Tonight Addie and her brothers put on a song for me.  I sat on the couch and they danced and sang with all their hearts.  She didn’t know all the words but she sang as if it was the concert of a lifetime.  As the song ended I applauded and she came at me with her arms flung open wide.  As she wrapped her little arms tight around my neck she said definitely, “And that is how much we love you!”  We love you a whole song.  We love you enough to dance like fools in our living room.  We love you at the top of our lungs.  We love you.

And ultimately that is what I want to learn best from Addie- how to live a life that declares love to others.  I love you enough to be silly and free.  I love you enough to be present here with you.  I love you enough to listen.  I love you enough to rejoice in who you are.  Like Addie, I hope that the song of my life belts out, “And that is how much I love you!”