it's true. emptiness sucks and I try and avoid it all cost. I have so much space and free time right now as I am unwillingly unemployed. I find myself in and out of anxiety and 'but what if....." so quickly throughout the day. ....it pushes the small amount of trust I have in God to the edge, and doubting thoughts of God's goodness for me arise quickly. This is a moment-by-moment surrendering. This is the hard, day to day work of opening to Love in all things. Lord have mercy.....help me trust your goodness for me in all the spaces.

I am sensing a theme of "surrender" in your recent posts, Abbie. Why is it so hard to surrender to an interminably loving God or to the to the present moment? I believe that is where evil gets us best--by convincing us that our present circumstances or our present God is not enough to conquer the discontentment in the world.

I recently started having a Bible verse emailed to me every morning. As I get off the night shift, I read it on the way out the door to my car and meditate on it for a minute before I drive home. In that moment of meditation, I find such a sense of peace. I pray that as I continue to grow in faith that the moment becomes two and I can continue to meditate throughout my day. Undoubtedly I pray that for others as well.

It isn't much but it is a minute--a minute more focused on the Savior, surrendered to his teachings.