Paying A Price

I’ve been thinking about the cost of obedience, and how following your calling in life sometimes means giving up a little bit of yourself, your hopes and your dreams. I’ve been studying the word “perfect” and its Biblical relevance, and I believe that the more I read and understand, the more I realize that perfection comes in those moments that we die to our own desires to give into the plans and calling that God has for our life. I think that perhaps I can only draw on a very personal example to illustrate my point.

I know a woman, beautiful inside and out, who was successful in everything she set her heart and mind to. She grew up in an environment of chaos, yet somehow figured out how to succeed at life and all that she took on. She was successful as a student, a business woman and a missionary, yet none of these seemed to be completely able to express who she was. She loved to write creatively, and decided to pursue graduate training in a creative writing program. She was accepted into a highly competitive graduate school to pursue a Masters of Fine Arts through a low residency online program. I wasn’t aware at the time, but I learned that this is the highest degree in this field, and equivalent to a Ph.D. She was successful in starting this endeavor as well, completing her first year of study before taking time off to expand her family with a baby boy. Now a mother of two, she was faced with the decision of returning to school and enrolling in the labor intensive thesis writing portion of the degree. When discussing what to do, she simply said, “If I begin school again I’m doing this for me, but it will mean a sacrifice on my children and in raising them.” And with those words, she chose her calling over her dreams. The reality of her choice…it stems from knowing who she is and knowing that God has called her for this season to be a mother to two children who will grow up knowing they are loved, attended to, cared for, watched over and embraced by the arms of someone who was always there at each step of their lives. It’s not always rewarding, it’s not always glamorous and in fact, it is sometimes treacherous. It doesn’t allow you to add letters after your name, enhance your marketability or give you anything to add to your professional resume. In fact, by modern American standards, being a “stay at home mom” is less than respected in the eyes of many. She changes a dozen diapers a day, cleans the same 8x8 space over and over again, reads stories, cooks lunches and provides love and guidance. The reality is that she knows that her job is to raise up a new generation of children who will live their life sold out to the same great calling that has guided her to this place. It simply can’t get any more important than that.

It brings me to the point…sometimes God’s calling for our lives isn’t glamorous, doesn’t give us accolades, doesn’t get us recognized by the world. In the grand scheme of His kingdom, all of that needs to be secondary to where He desires for us to be. Then and only then can we live our lives perfectly in His will and according to His desires. He knows our sacrifices, honors our choices and stores up treasures in Heaven for those who follow.

Happy Mothers Day to my wife, who has placed one dream on hold to live out another and who continues each day to teach me the lesson of Christ’s perfect love as she dies to herself and lives selflessly to love and serve her family.